So you have decided to give nudism/naturism a try, good for you. Unlike those people who win the lottery and claim it wont change them, most naturists won’t make that same claim. In a textile dominated world, those of us who see clothes as an option rather than a requirement are going to do things a little differently once we escape from our fabric prisons. Your life will change, mostly for the better, and as a result you are going to make some changes too. We spent most of the holiday season with family, and that meant sadly wearing clothes. It did however get Tara and I talking about how we have changed and what changes we have made or intend to make. I made some notes and decided to share with all you wonderful people because it is winter, I live in Canada, and blog worthy naturist experiences will be a bit fewer and farther between for the next few months.
Change comes in many varieties, some are simple enough, others are more complicated. The first thing you will do is change your main living space to make it naturist friendly. I have discussed this from a few different angles in previous blog posts, how to survive a Canadian winter is a perfect example. When I moved in with Tara last year, she was more of a part time naturist and only made a few minor adjustments prior to my moving in. Now that this is my home as well, some agreed to make some additional upgrades. We are lucky her backyard is very private, just some new evergreen shrubs and cedars needed planting in one corner to fill a void created when the trees and bushes go bare in the fall through to spring. Having a dual income to work with also allowed us to splurge and get a hot tub installed. For naturists and textiles alike I would highly recommend this expense, we use it almost daily no matter the weather. Even a basic model is not exactly cheap however, and we wanted something more midrange. Add to that the cost of installation, leveling ground, a new electrical hookup, and so on, this was a huge expense that we did not make on a whim. The reward however, you cannot put a price on it. We still enjoy the occasional visit to our nearby Naturist resort that has an indoor pool and sauna, but it is hard to do better than the convenience of a hot tub steps from your back door. We have ours placed so that it is fully private but open enough we can
As I said, compared to me Tara was more of a part time naturist before I moved in. She even took a step back when we first became a couple. So that we could focus on the couple part, we spent a lot more time with our clothes on and that broke the nudity habit to some degree, especially for her. Once we agreed to go full forward with our relationship that all changed. New couples tend to spend more time without clothes on, and as a naturist couple we usually didn’t bother to put them back on again in those “situations”. With us moving in together and the changes we made to our home, I would say we both spend 90% of the time nude when we can with the only real exceptions being work and when we socialise with non naturists and family.
With our naturist oasis at home, it has had some unintended impacts on our lives. In today’s world you really do not have to leave the house much. We are much more likely now to order delivery food than go to a restaurant. Websites like Uber Eats & Skip the Dishes make it almost too easy. Take out bills can add up quickly so we have also been experimenting with a variety of new recipes to get us cooking at home more and thankfully you can even get groceries delivered by Grocery Gateway and similar services. We never liked grocery shopping anyway so this has been excellent. We usually only run to the store for last minute or forgotten items. We did all of our Christmas shopping online this year, Amazon, BestBuy, and so on. Sure you have to cover up for the delivery people, I know some of you do not even cover up for them but different strokes for different folks.
This all sounds great right? It is! It is amazing how long you can go without clothes when you hardly leave your home. On the other hand, this can impact your social life significantly. With regret, we noticed recently that the friends we spend the most time with was until recently a slightly longer list. We have a couple friends we have made through naturism that we see more often these days, not to mention our “Nude Years Eve” friends who are all regulars for nude game nights and dinner parties. Sadly this means we are not seeing our textile friends who we either have not shared our naturist life with yet, or those who we have and are still close, but have no interest in joining our naturist activities. It was over the holidays that really brought this home for us and it really can be a little depressing. Friends with whom we have so many great memories we are unintentionally excluding from our lives. Realising this was a lightbulb moment for us though and we intend to find a better balance between our naturist and textile lives. Social circles often change over the years, and as much as we love naturism we will sacrifice here and there, put on some pants, walk out the front door and spend time with our textile friends that remain important to us.
The reality is you can’t truly make the most of life if you don’t often leave your house, with or without clothes. So we also try to make the most of those times we do venture outdoors, even if we have to be among the “textiles”. This happened when we attended a wedding near Kingston, which is about a 3 hour drive away and involved an overnight stay. While there was an offer to use a spare room at a friends, we declined and got a hotel room under the guise of being a new couple wanting some “privacy”.
If we have to spend the night anywhere we generally try to book a hotel so we can still go without clothes, even if it’s just while sleeping and for our morning coffee. Vacation planning, big or small, we now have the naturism angle top of mind. We are lucky that where many of our out-of-town family and friends happen to live, in most cases there are naturist clubs or beaches nearby so in warmer month’s we have every intention to add on a day or two to those trips to work on our all over tans someplace new at every opportunity. And while we have yet to go on a real destination vacation as a couple, the hot tub actually has pushed any hope of that back for a while, we are considering a dream trip to the Caribbean or Mexico and the only resorts we are looking at are clothing optional or fully naturist ones. In the short term we are staying closer to home and will take full advantage of our local Naturist parks, Ponderosa and Bare Oaks this spring and summer. Every free moment soon comes to be seen as an opportunity to be naturally nude whenever possible. We already spend any free day that comes our way during warmer days at the Port Burwell nude beach. Ponderosa is only a short drive from Oakville so we have visited many times this past year.
Something I have seen others mention many times that I would like to touch on is the positive impact at a mental level naturism has had on us. I was raised in fairly conservative home where nudity was a taboo and it was hard for me to get away from that feeling. It took time but eventually it will fades and before you know it you are discussing sports with a lovely couple while their kids play in the sand and no one cares at all that you are all completely naked. Finding the courage to get past the taboo is a big step for some of us however once you take that step, anything that would hold you back for pushing your boundaries seems so much less of a barrier. I am much more adventurous and willing to try new things now and it does not hurt that many naturist activities are physical ones as well, swimming, hiking, volleyball, so we are living a healthier lifestyle too. It has a wonderful effect on your body image, that leads to being more comfortable and confident even when wearing clothes. I could go on for some length about how naturism has changed our perspective on clothes when we actually put them on. I have never been comfortable wearing briefs and since becoming a naturist even boxers make me uncomfortable so I am essentially a “commando” guy now. Tara has stopped wearing a bra most of the time, only with certain work outfits does she feel it is necessary to wear one and as such tends to buy and wear only clothes that enable her to go without. I could probably do a whole blog on body image and clothing for naturists.
Finally I want discuss our perspective about naturism in respect to our textile friends, family, and in relation to our jobs has changed. I have said before that I keep my naturism separate from my textile life and for reasons I have mentioned many times that wont be changing anytime soon. We are slowly opening up to more of our inner circle but at our own pace and when we feel the time is right. What has changed is how I feel about keeping this from close friends and family who I am normally very open with. When you are keeping any secret you are in many cases going to be put in a position that you have to outright lie. In the early days I felt like it was some terrible secret life that for lack of a better way to put it, I felt a little ashamed about. I am sure we have all been there in some way. Your boss asks “how was your weekend, do anything fun?” and I am not in a position where “I went bowling naked with total strangers” is going to do my career path any favours. So I lied and I felt bad about it every time. With friends and family it was the same, you dodge, avoid or lie. That was when naturism for me was still this crazy new thing that I felt awkward about. Even talking to another naturist about naturism could be uncomfortable at times. Eventually I came to the conclusion that everyone has a private life, everyone has secrets and there really is nothing wrong with that. Some people have secrets that I am sure make my enjoyment for being naked outdoors seem tame by comparison. If we are close enough that I trust to share this side of me with you, great. Until then that is my choice and I don’t feel bad about it anymore. This was not an easy transition for me, it took some time. Tara I think had less of a problem than I did but she is just a better person overall.
With any significant adjustment to your lifestyle, moving to a new city, getting married or having kids, starting a new job, spending your free time naked outside with other people, it is going to have ups and downs. It wont always be positive in nature but in the big picture, change is a good thing. New can be exciting, and exciting can be fun. Who would not want to do something fun? The benefits have far outweighed the drawbacks for both of us. I hope that has been the case for any of you reading this.